From being the one who was always talked over in a group setting to getting knots in my stomach when I got called on, I was no stranger to being deemed “the shy girl” in my younger years. Since then I have grown in confidence and found my voice, but there is an unheard of blessing I have found in growing up shy.
A pattern I have found through observing the behaviors of others is our reactions to certain situations often reflect the areas of insecurity we faced in the past. I have been in the shoes of someone who was silenced by outside and inside voices — these shoes have since been donated or thrown away. Whenever I am faced with someone who has a hard time using their voice or getting their point across, I make it a point to listen. I know how it feels.
It is human nature to pay attention to the loudest in the room. The society we live in is a constant competition to see who has the most powerful and booming voice. In politics, it is typical for a loud person to be put in the position of power to represent the voices of the people. Yet, we still see silenced voices in every nation. As a society, we have simply forgotten how to listen.
There is nothing greater than the reaction a quiet person has when I let them know I am listening as someone begins to talk over them. My past insecurity has shaped me into who I am today and gave me an awareness of the constant battles people face in day-to-day life. Not only did this guide my listening abilities, but it also grew my compassion for others. A habit I had when I was younger was to make a schedule for my stuffed animals to sleep with me so there wasn’t one who felt left behind. Soon I realized I was too lazy for a calendar system so I resorted to sleeping with all twenty of my stuffed animals. While it wasn’t comfortable, I knew how it felt to be left behind, and I refused to let any stuffed animal feel that way.
While this is just a silly example from my childhood, it has taught me the importance of building character. It showed me that sometimes it is a blessing in disguise to be the one left out or the quiet one in the crowd. As humans, we can use our rough patches we faced in the past to grow our compassion towards others. After all, we are only human.